What my name apparent says about me

You Are Powerful and Determined

You are confident, self assured, and capable. You are not easily intimidated.
You master any and all skills easily. You don’t have to work hard for what you want.
You make your life out to be exactly how you want it. And you’ll knock down anyone who gets in your way!

You are well rounded, with a complete perspective on life.
You are solid and dependable. You are loyal, and people can count on you.
At times, you can be a bit too serious. You tend to put too much pressure on yourself.

You are fair, honest, and logical. You are a natural leader, and people respect you.
You never give up, and you will succeed… even if it takes you a hundred tries.
You are rational enough to see every part of a problem. You are great at giving other people advice.

You tend to be pretty tightly wound. It’s easy to get you excited… which can be a good or bad thing.
You have a lot of enthusiasm, but it fades rather quickly. You don’t stick with any one thing for very long.
You have the drive to accomplish a lot in a short amount of time. Your biggest problem is making sure you finish the projects you start.

You are the total package – suave, sexy, smart, and strong.
You have the whole world under your spell, and you can influence almost everyone you know.
You don’t always resist your urges to crush the weak. Just remember, they don’t have as much going for them as you do.

You are relaxed, chill, and very likely to go with the flow.
You are light hearted and accepting. You don’t get worked up easily.
Well adjusted and incredibly happy, many people wonder what your secret to life is.

You are usually the best at everything … you strive for perfection.
You are confident, authoritative, and aggressive.
You have the classic “Type A” personality.

You are a seeker of knowledge, and you have learned many things in your life.
You are also a keeper of knowledge – meaning you don’t spill secrets or spread gossip.
People sometimes think you’re snobby or aloof, but you’re just too deep in thought to pay attention to them.

You are very intuitive and wise. You understand the world better than most people.
You also have a very active imagination. You often get carried away with your thoughts.
You are prone to a little paranoia and jealousy. You sometimes go overboard in interpreting signals.

You are balanced, orderly, and organized. You like your ducks in a row.
You are powerful and competent, especially in the workplace.
People can see you as stubborn and headstrong. You definitely have a dominant personality.

You are friendly, charming, and warm. You get along with almost everyone.
You work hard not to rock the boat. Your easy going attitude brings people together.
At times, you can be a little flaky and irresponsible. But for the important things, you pull it together.

The Absence of Success is not the Presence of Failure

I can tell you as someone who has experience different forms of failure, failing is not easy! why?, because you most certainly did not set out to fail in the first place – and if you  my dear friend did set out to fail or have been called “someone who can do nothing but fail”, the you my friend are a WINNER! – you have managed to succeed at failing, which i can tell you is a mean feat in its own right.

Failing has so much mad press that we forget that only the lucky ones succeed the first time round. Yes, i used the forgiven word to hardworkers – Lucky. But i want you to read that word over and over again and tell yourself that hardwork + luck (or  good timing for the no-label users) = success, because no matter how hard you work and how many doors you knock, if your timing is off, you aren’t going to get the result you want.

I have failed several times over – I have gotten Fails in tests, a 2.2 degree, failed to show compassion in relationship, failed to get loads of jobs. I have failed! This, however does not make me a failure. I am not a failure because everytime I have failed, I have learnt one more way not to fail. I know I have one less way of failing because i have tried something and know not to go that exact route again. I found that learning what not to do is possibly the most effective (despite depressing) way of learning what best to do. The process of failing and failing before you succeed is not easy! It is a path that is sometimes very painful, very costly and downright depressing. BUT once you move past the pain and agony, once you put on your well-worn armour and brave face, you realise that you haven’t lost, you have just run into a pothole on the road to success and you need a change of tyres. At this point, don’t be afraid to fix your suspension (your support system, friends/family/mentors), recharge your batteries (get some rest, breath and reassess), change your oil (cv/job/study time/diet/anything), and have a look at your map (decide on the way forward). Once you have had a tune up, you can then have another go at succeeding.

It took me a few months to realise this process, but I did realise that me failing was not the end of the road. I learnt so much about life and myself in my attempt at succeeding that i stopped thinking of my lack of successes as fails, I began to see them as pit-stops on the way to success.  So, I leave you with the words of Edwin C. Bliss as you move from “failing” to succeeding with a backpocket of stories to remind you to that success is never out of your reach.

“Success does not mean the absence of failures.
It means the attainment of ultimate objectives.
It means winning the war, not every battle.” – Edwin C. Bliss

 

Success is an iceberg. Source Google (https://www.google.co.uk/search?q=absence+of+success+is+not+failure&safe=active&client=firefox-a&hs=xVV&rls=org.mozilla:en-GB:official&source=lnms&tbm=isch&sa=X&ei=OZR8VIK0Hq2v7Ab68IHgBw&ved=0CAgQ_AUoAQ&biw=1920&bih=974#facrc=_&imgdii=_&imgrc=9jUQjYZb7BGN8M%253A%3BuoSnu-RNnx1nbM%3Bhttp%253A%252F%252F4.bp.blogspot.com%252F-778ynEBvxrE%252FVDwbiruUlqI%252FAAAAAAAAAUk%252FOsK6cXAsASg%252Fs1600%252Fsuccess%25252Bis%25252Ban%25252Biceberg.jpg%3Bhttp%253A%252F%252Fhelenaswordrobe.blogspot.com%252F%3B524%3B410)

Success is an iceberg. Source Google

 

I gave up men because I am emotionally unavailable…

…well, at least I am trying to give up men (and no, I am not into women for all you wondering minds).
If there is one thing to know about me, it is that I do not do outward emotions very well. I can do HAPPY, dead-pan, TIRED, sad or angry (if I try hard enough) but I am what you normally call emotionally bankrupt. Except I am not emotionally bankrupt, I have plenty of emotions – mostly swinging between happy and totally (inwardly) distressed.

When it comes to life, I know how to put on my smiley brave face no matter what happens because I know I would be fine! Come rain, sunshine, an F or an A (it better be an A) on my midterms, I know I would figure something out.BUT when it comes to dating and relationships, the ball is not in my court. I have no control over everything that happens. Heck, I don’t even think I have control over 10% of what happens. Which mean, I have no clue whatsoever if I would be fine. And that scares the crap out of me because I am broken. I am broken, by past mistakes, past relationships and past experiences. And I am not willing to fix myself only for someone to pick me apart – so I am emotionally unavailable!

Being emotionally unavailable is actually more common than you may think. If you are the type of guy or girl that is only attracted to men and women already in relationships, then my dear you are emotionally unavailable because you know deep down you do not want to be in a relationship. You cannot stand the thought of you opening up yourself to the possibility of being hurt. So you got through the motion of “dating” just to satisfy the need to be with someone else.

Well, I am done with that because believe it or not, someone still gets hurt. Being me, I would always be the one hurt because no matter how things go, the pain I feel is either from being hurt or the guilt from me hurting someone without knowing it. SO I QUIT

My Journey to University

Today, I had to write a narrative about my journey to university for a refresher course as a student ambassador at my uni and this is the draft I wrote.

Unlike most ambassadors here today, QM is actually second university – and I do not meansecond choice. However, this is to be expected of someone doing their third degree spanning over 3
different subject areas (that is, if you exclude my 2 year dabble into medicine). And since I have been
told to give a narrative into my journey to university, I have decided to talk about my journey to QM; as it is by far more interesting. My journey here, standing in front of you today has
been filled bad news, more bad news, pep talks over home cooking and lots of random one-man flash mobs in class.

I was officially diagnosed with Chronic migraines in 2011; which thankfully is not a life threatening illness but it is definitely life altering. In the midst of brain scans, drug trials and part-time jobs to keep my finances alive, I went from being top of my game to “I’d just be happy to graduate alive”.
This was not helped by the mean HR lady who told me I would not get a pass grade at university neither would I get into Investment Banking. I had tomake a tough decision make – drop out of university for the time being and go back home or continue at university without support knowing
the highest grade I would achieve was a 2.2. I choose the 2.2, knowing it take lots of emotional bribery and a miracle to get where I wanted to be. And come August 2013, I got a miracle in form of
a last minute application to do a graduate diploma at QM. Why? They were willing to work around my medical history, giving me support and academic freedom to excel within a challenging environment.

So 1 half-sob, 20 chocolate soufflés, 46 in-class dance acts and 201 hugs of support later, I stand
proud before you as the perfect 4.0 GPA student doing an MSc in one of the best Universities a student can hope for. Oh, and I did get into investment banking

Pretence 101: Adulthood

You know that saying that if you believe in yourself anything is possible, well I have adopted that principle to adulthood. As you are all (not) aware that I turned 22!! a week ago, and since I realised that in all my pretence to be an adult, I have fully embraced, unwillingly if I might add, all the trappings of the adulthood thing.

No matter how old I get, I would still HATE shopping 

I can do my laundry the way I WANT IT  

Sleep is MY new BEST FRIEND

 

I tried beer and it isn’t Horrible

 

Best of all, 

I am perfectly content with where I am right now – I am still broke, single and looking for a graduate job BUT my birthday this year was the best because I was on the right path. I actually realised that despite what my undergraduate lecturer and the HR woman from the bank which shall not be mentioned, I am SMART, BEAUTIFUL and will be SUCCESSFUL (in Investment Banking – my internship reference proves it)!

In other news, i almost like a boy and no longer mind taking pictures – enjoy

 


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I am single cuz I’m nice aka Boys are a mass of contradiction

Its bad enough when people half your age have better love-lives than you do but when your love-life sucks because YOU ARE TOO DAWN NICE that just burns. Let’s be honest here, I think I’m a nice person but not scarily nice that I heavens forbid undateable – which is why I was perplexed to be dumped and then told you are nice, you’d find someone else.

If you didn’t know said ex of mine, here is a sum up of how I became awestruck at my latest (mis)fortunate.

So le boo wasn’t looking to meet any girl but had an open mind in case he met a NICE girl along the way (as I write this, Ii question the last part of my statement). However, he was shocked to find said niceness in a short (black) Nigerian girl and truth be told he thought said girl would become a scary version of herself once the relationship became official. 7 months, a few fights, one missed family meeting, 1 breakup and the chase that ensued (that’s a story for another day) later, the girl i.e. ME was still considerably nice. Then came a business trip to Nigeria (him not me),  night of uneventful conversation (mainly cuz i was ill) and BAM!!! You are hereby dumped (again) because you are nice enough to get someone else.

So herein lies my confusion! if you want a nice girl but then you dump her cuz she is nice!!! I was always told women are a mass of contradiction but I didn’t know MEN ALREADY HELD THE FIRST PLACE PRIZE for that category. women at least give you months of signs and notice of their impending bomb-shell.

 

So please can someone enlighten me on the dangers of being nice in a relationship because I am now not afraid to tell ladies in good faith that they shouldn’t be too shy to thrown in a few scary moments into their relationships if they want to keep their man. 

Ever After

Many a times, I sit wondering if there is such as thing as Happy Ever After. I just don’t mean the one you see on TV with Cinderella and all the other Disney characters – I mean real life happy ever after. Let’s be honest this is not the newest topic on planet earth but I’m quite fascinated by happily ever afters. Some people say yes they are happy ever afters whilst some adamantly protest against the very notion of happy ever afters.
I am of the opinion that we go through life in a series of happy ever afters. Frankly the notion of having just one happy ever after is just too depressing to think-I will like to think I would live my life with many many happy moments. But really what counts as a happy ever after – by its most popular definition it means finding love in another person BUT is that all there is to it. What if I am one of the unlucky ones and never find love, does that mean I don’t have a happy ever after? Does pursuing a career and wealth stop me from finding love another person?
Well, I think not! I will live my life with many many happy ever afters because I have decided to mark the end of every happy phase in my life at the end of the story. Think you it as the series 24 – the characters always change every season but the constant are Jack Bauer and Chloe O’Brian – I am the one constant in my life and everyone else just moves along. I have happy days and I have bad days but in the end I will relish in the thought that I will had many happy days by the time I’m gone.